Post by JASPER MATHIEU DEVEROUX, on Jan 5, 2011 9:33:11 GMT
DEVEROUX, jasper m a t h i e u
hey, isn't that mat devine?
the boys you left[/color][/size]
"are men you didn't raise"
NAME: Jasper Mathieu Deveroux
NICKNAME(S): Jas, Jaspy, Jazzy, Jasp, J.D.
AGE: Twenty-Two
BAND POSITION: Vocalist of Pressure
SEXUAL ORIENTATION: Straight
the clock is ticking[/color][/size]
"what am i gonna do when the last song's over?"
HISTORY: Well, hi there... this is weird, no one's ever really asked me for my full history before. It's not really that interesting, I don't think. But, if you insist on knowing, I don't have anything to hide, really. So, okay, uhm... from the beginning I guess?
My birthday is April 16th. My parents names are Abigail Jones (everyone calls her Abby, though) and Adam Deveroux. They had me when they were young, you know, in their teens, way before they even thought about getting married. I guess it was kind of unplanned. But, I think it all worked out in the long run... well, not really all of it, but... uhm --- I guess we'll just continue on? I was born in Norwalk, Connecticut, but my parents relocated to Chicago, Illionis because that's where most of my mom's family lived. We lived in an apartment, close to my Aunt Stephanie's house. I spent a lot of time there growing up. She was a few years older than my mom, with a steady job and a decent income. So, I was there a lot while my parents were out working. She kind of raised me more than my parents did... not that I'm saying anything bad about my parents, of course.
I didn't see my parents a lot, but I know they were -- well, are -- good people. I love them both very much. I respect and appreciate all the stuff they gave up just to keep me happy and safe. Growing up, it wasn't exactly the easiest at our house. I mean, both my parents worked two jobs, and my dad was always out at bars and gigs trying to make it in his band. He played the guitar, piano, sang... he could do it all. I admire him very much. I remember all those nights I would stay up late just to hear him come in and sit down at the piano and just... play.
He taught me a little bit, too. He's the reason I wanted to get into music. Ever since I was little, I wanted to be in a band, just like him, you know? My mom always talks so great about him, how he was able to be a loving husband, and a devoted father, all while trying to achieve his dreams. I really wish he would've made it big. Well, I mean -- I guess he did. He'll always be the greatest musician in the world to me. I wish I could've known him longer. I really wish he was still here. I hope I make him really proud.
To explain... my dad got into a car accident when I was eight. I felt so, lost, after it happened. I could barely function. And being so young, it was so hard to understand that my dad, my coach, wasn't going to be coming home. I would still wait up some nights, though, just hoping to hear him come in and play again. It was devastating. Fuck, I mean... it's still devastating, you know? I look at old pictures, and, I talk to my mom on the phone, and I just think... I just wish I could hear his voice again, too. I wonder what he would say. Like, I wonder, what he would look like, or, be doing, or what he would think of me... I guess I'll just, never know...
Well, things got, a lot harder after that. My mom had to pick up two jobs just to keep our apartment, and have food. I didn't see much of her anymore. She spent a lot of time working and paying bills. I would go to school, come home, and just be... alone, I guess. I mean, I didn't really do much, anyway -- I had a few friends, but I was always kind of outcasted at school. Even back then I was kind of a freak and dressed like the hobo that I am today, haha... just kidding, kind of.
But uh, yeah... in order to sort of, make my life better, I guess, I was "shipped off" to live with my Aunt Stephanie. She had the nice house, livin' the good life, and since my mom was struggling to keep the both of us afloat, she at least wanted me to go out and get a taste of something... better. And you know, I gave her a lot of shit for it at the time. I mean, first I lost my dad, and now my mom didn't even want me? Some family. Looking back now, though, I would take it all back if I could. I appreciate what my mom did for me. I mean, it kind of sucked at the time, but like... it opened me up to so many opportunities that I never would've had if I didn't move in with Aunt Steph. Like, I probably wouldn't even have this band if it wasn't for this change.
I stayed in Chicago with Aunt Steph for a few years, finished grade school and everything. Right after that, though, I got more not very awesome news. Her job was asking her to move out to New Jersey (what the fuck, right? That's what I was thinking -- like, who the hell lives in New Jersey?), and, I had to go too. Pack up everything, leave the city, and go out to bumbfucking-ass New Jersey. I put up such a fight, it was awful. I hated moving... it sucked, having to leave my friends, the city, my family. But, we went through with it...
A few weeks after we even got there my miserable self somehow caught the eye of this gorgeous, bad-ass chick named Juliet. We clicked instantly -- we were best friends right away, and soon, we were dating. I also met the band around this time. We all sort of started out as a big group of friends, outcasts to the whole stereotypical high school scene, and, we just sort of launched into a band from there. It was like, a dream come true. A hot girl, a rocking band, just like dad... I couldn't believe it.
Things were going good for a few years. I was happy. Seventeen, though, things got a little... messy. Juliet ended up... pregnant, that year. And, all the sudden, things got rough for me. I didn't know what to do. The band was just starting to take off, I had school to worry about, my family... I didn't know the first thing about kids. But, neither of us wanted an abortion, and, Juliet felt too attached to give her up to some other family. I mean, it was hard --- it wasn't just a one-two decision like that. That whole nine months and then some after, I swear I barely slept. I came really close to dropping the band, because, things just got crazy. I was so overwhelmed with just, everything I couldn't take it.
Once the baby was born, though... I don't know what it was, it was just... I don't know. I was so nervous and scared and worried and freaking out but I just felt, happy, I guess. I don't know how to explain it. Her name is Emelia Noelle Deveroux. I call her Emma, though... mostly everyone else does, too. She was -- and still is, of course -- beautiful. You know, at the end of the day, despite all the struggle and despite all the craziness, I'm so grateful to have her in my life, you know?
But, it wasn't all sunshine and rainbows. I had to juggle a lot of things -- raising a daughter, my relationship, the band, family, school. It was tough, and honestly, things only got worse. The all-time low of those next few years, though, was finding Juliet... cheating on me. It was such a slap in the face. We were together for so long, and to find out that all of that was just, a lie? I wanted to kill her, and the stupid guy she cheated on. As you can imagine, that was the end of that relationship. It was my first experience with breakup, and you know honestly, I don't think I'll ever forget it.
Things are a little more stable now, though. I graduated, and focused all my energy on two things: being a good father to Emma, and the band. And, honestly, everything has been working out really well. I just hope things keep looking up... for all of us.
hanging on every word i say[/color][/size]
"move close and i will push you away"
LIKES: photography, fashion, makeup, friends, music, family, cigarettes, thunderstorms, sunset, laughter, sleeping, romance, silence, peace, hats, reading, chicago, walking, watching movies, drawing, cosmetology, vodka, accents, fireworks, ambition
DISLIKES: being held back, feeling unwanted, being alone, germs, obnoxious chewing, lies, lateness, getting sick, needles, clowns, fake laughs, car crashes, heart attacks, bad grammar/spelling, sharks
spit your pity in my soul[/color][/size]
"my heart is just too dark to care"
NAME: Madeline
AGE: Eighteen
EXPERIENCE: Approx. Four Years
HOW YOU FOUND US: Ad on a site
i can feel you breathing[/color][/size]
"even though you're next to me i still feel so alone"
The Cat-Scratch Club: despite it being one of the most sophisticated and well-known gentleman's clubs out there, Jasper Devine couldn't help but feel like some sort of sleaze anytime he so much as walked by, let alone went inside it. Just the thought of watching a bunch of half-naked women swinging around a pole made him feel so... dirty, as if he was absolutely desperate for companionship, or some sort of cheap thrill ride. Plus, his reputation was already pretty horrible as it was; he didn't need everyone else in town thinking he was some sort of manwhore who was out for a good time to make things even worse... not that Jasper really thought much about what society thought of him, of course. But, still, he was definitely guaranteed to never find a girlfriend if everyone considered him to be some sort of trashy slut, so, it was probably best to steer clear of that kind of stereotype, at least until he graduated, and broke out of all the drama and gossip that high school was packaged with.
However, as awkward as Jasper felt about being there, it did give off those heated vibes that came with the nightlife, thus making it a wonderful spot to take pictures, purely for the fact that it showed reality at it's finest... or perhaps just most twisted. The intense passion and lust burning in the eyes of men and women alike was that of profound ferocity and desire, and reflected in the dim, multi-colored lights that flashed around the dancers and viewers, it made for truly awe-inspiring photos. The behaviors of those inside the club were barbaric and animalistic, thus showing a darker, more extreme side of Paigeville, driven by desire and pleasure -- the complete opposite of the quiet, homely state of being the town was known for. Thus being the reason why Jasper had taken the trip there, all by his lonesome, with nothing but his own mind and camera for company: for the realism he was able to capture within his photography.
And so, with one more quick glance over his shoulder, he bit his lip, held his breath, and slipped through the large, tinted-glass doors that held the divide between the complexities of the real world and a land of erotic fantasies, a place that offered an escape, where men and women could forget their conflicts and delve into their own sensual phantasms, if only for one night. He hesitated in the threshold for a moment, his eyes wide and jaw dropped, clutching the camera that hung from his shoulder in the same manner that some sort of perplexed or shocked child would clutch their teddy bear or blanket. Part of him was tempted to just run back out again, back to the sweet innocence that was his home, or the cute little park down the street -- back to some place he knew to be safe. But, his tense muscles refused to contract and turn around. He felt much too bewildered to move. The place was like an elegant car wreck: hideous and terrible, and yet, oh so intriguing. The kind of thing you didn't want to look at, and yet couldn't take your eyes off of. It was disgusting... and yet Jasper had never been more fascinated.
Slowly but surely, he began to regain consciousness, feeling his motor skills suddenly kicking back into gear. He simultaneously shook his head and blinked rapidly in succession, hoping to bring himself back down to Earth a bit faster than the rate he was going. He chewed on the inside of his lip anxiously before finally moving out of the doorway, dodging and sliding gracefully in and out of the crowds of people in search of the bar. After such a thrilling experience that was walking into the Cat-Scratch Club for the first time, he was in dire need of something to dull his senses and relax the fast-paced beating of his heart.
Once out of the thick jungle of people that had swarmed around the stage, Jasper exhaled deeply, heavily releasing the breath he was holding in, the claustrophobia that had begun to swarm him dissipating like smoke in the air. He gingerly slid into one of the empty seats on the edge, still gripping the camera at his side, so tightly that the texture of it was beginning to embed itself into Jasper's palm. The sweet fragrances of alcohol and cigarettes suddenly began to flow through his nostrils, their scent already beginning to calm him down. His hazel eyes scanned the area behind the counter, hoping to catch the eye of the bartender. However, before he could spot whomever it was that was mixing drinks, his curious gaze wandered over to the stage, the three women upon it slowly beginning to capture his interest.
However, as awkward as Jasper felt about being there, it did give off those heated vibes that came with the nightlife, thus making it a wonderful spot to take pictures, purely for the fact that it showed reality at it's finest... or perhaps just most twisted. The intense passion and lust burning in the eyes of men and women alike was that of profound ferocity and desire, and reflected in the dim, multi-colored lights that flashed around the dancers and viewers, it made for truly awe-inspiring photos. The behaviors of those inside the club were barbaric and animalistic, thus showing a darker, more extreme side of Paigeville, driven by desire and pleasure -- the complete opposite of the quiet, homely state of being the town was known for. Thus being the reason why Jasper had taken the trip there, all by his lonesome, with nothing but his own mind and camera for company: for the realism he was able to capture within his photography.
And so, with one more quick glance over his shoulder, he bit his lip, held his breath, and slipped through the large, tinted-glass doors that held the divide between the complexities of the real world and a land of erotic fantasies, a place that offered an escape, where men and women could forget their conflicts and delve into their own sensual phantasms, if only for one night. He hesitated in the threshold for a moment, his eyes wide and jaw dropped, clutching the camera that hung from his shoulder in the same manner that some sort of perplexed or shocked child would clutch their teddy bear or blanket. Part of him was tempted to just run back out again, back to the sweet innocence that was his home, or the cute little park down the street -- back to some place he knew to be safe. But, his tense muscles refused to contract and turn around. He felt much too bewildered to move. The place was like an elegant car wreck: hideous and terrible, and yet, oh so intriguing. The kind of thing you didn't want to look at, and yet couldn't take your eyes off of. It was disgusting... and yet Jasper had never been more fascinated.
Slowly but surely, he began to regain consciousness, feeling his motor skills suddenly kicking back into gear. He simultaneously shook his head and blinked rapidly in succession, hoping to bring himself back down to Earth a bit faster than the rate he was going. He chewed on the inside of his lip anxiously before finally moving out of the doorway, dodging and sliding gracefully in and out of the crowds of people in search of the bar. After such a thrilling experience that was walking into the Cat-Scratch Club for the first time, he was in dire need of something to dull his senses and relax the fast-paced beating of his heart.
Once out of the thick jungle of people that had swarmed around the stage, Jasper exhaled deeply, heavily releasing the breath he was holding in, the claustrophobia that had begun to swarm him dissipating like smoke in the air. He gingerly slid into one of the empty seats on the edge, still gripping the camera at his side, so tightly that the texture of it was beginning to embed itself into Jasper's palm. The sweet fragrances of alcohol and cigarettes suddenly began to flow through his nostrils, their scent already beginning to calm him down. His hazel eyes scanned the area behind the counter, hoping to catch the eye of the bartender. However, before he could spot whomever it was that was mixing drinks, his curious gaze wandered over to the stage, the three women upon it slowly beginning to capture his interest.
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